What Hurts The Most
by xXxPrettyinPinkxXx
Summary: Jo walked away to her new life, leaving Kendall behind when he loved her. A little one-shot about Kendall and Jo after they broke up with Cascada's song mixed in, hopefully very sweet :D My first-ever song-fic! I hope you like it!


**What Hurts the Most**

**AN: I know, I know, I **_**should**_** be working on Blind since everything just got better again, but I was listening to this song (slow version!) and thought of Kendall and Jo, and how she left in Big Time Breakup, getting the inspiration for this short one-shot : ) I hope you like it, it's my 1st song-fic! :D**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN BIG TIME RUSH OR WHAT HURTS THE MOST. **

Kendall stared out the airport window, watching Jo's plane take off, with pure disbelief shown on his face. She left. His girlfriend, whom he had loved, had left for New Zealand for three years.

That was it: he loved her. _Loves_ her.

_But he would never get the chance to say it._

"Kendall? You okay?" Logan placed his hand on Kendall's shoulder, lightly leading the broken-hearted blonde back to the limo. _At least they had their last goodbye kiss._

"I guess so." Kendall shrugged. He let his friends lead him out of the airport, away from his love.

"Don't worry dude. You'll find someone else really soon." James smiled at him, trying to cheer up the mood. Kendall smiled back, hiding the fact he didn't want anyone else. It's nearly impossible to forget your first love. They always have a special part in your heart, no matter how much time passes.

"Yeah, James is right. You'll be back out there in no time. Let's get back to the Palm Woods and hit the pool!" Carlos got into the limo as quickly as he could, the other three laughing and getting in themselves. Kendall, however, got in last and stared back at the blue sky above the airport. He could've swore he saw a head of blonde hair waving back at him, but he knew it was just his imagination.

The whole ride back was filled with conversations between James, Carlos and Logan, and attempted conversations with Kendall, who just wasn't feeling it. He still felt numb; Jo's departure hadn't hit him full force yet.

_I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house,_

_that don't bother me._

_I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out._

_I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while_

_even though going on with you gone_

_still upsets me._

_There are days every now and again I pretend_

_I'm okay,_

_but that's not what gets me…_

That first night was the worst. Kendall was still numb and could feel nothing, just hollowness in his chest. He laid in his bed wondering if Jo missed him, if she was sad. He knew he was, even though he didn't feel anything.

He stared out his window, Logan's snores filling the room with muffled noise, and gazed at the moon and stars; _the same ones that Jo would see in New Zealand._ He smiled at the realization, and fell asleep, his last thoughts focused on Jo Taylor.

_What hurts the most_

_was being so close,_

_and having so much to say_

_and watching you walk away._

_And never knowing _

_what could have been,_

_and not seeing that loving you_

_is what I was trying to do…_

When he woke up the next morning, he groaned; he could now feel the sadness. It was a pain that never went away, but got worse depending on scenarios. When Logan talked about dates with Camille, when he walked down to the pool and saw couples holding hands, hugging, or even worse, kissing, that was when he felt it hardest. He had fallen in love and was suffering the consequences.

_It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go._

_but I'm doing it._

_It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends _

_and I'm alone._

_Still harder_

_getting up, getting dressed, living with this regret_

_but I know,_

_if I could do it over_

_I would trade, give away, all the words that I saved _

_in my heart_

_that were left unspoken…_

His friends were worried. Kendall now spent his days moping and silently crying on the orange couch in 2J. He seemed unfixable; the only cure was Jo, and that was not an option.

He had never even told Jo he loved her.

"Kendall, come on, we're going to the Palm Woods Park." Logan told him as the three watching him, frowns on their faces.

"You go ahead, I wanna stay here." He replied into a pillow. His friends knew he needed time alone to think over his thoughts, and left him alone in 2J.

Alone, Kendall thought about Jo, and only Jo.

Then, he realized: he still had his phone, and Jo had hers.

He quickly went to his room, and grabbed his phone, quickly dialing the number of the voice he wanted nothing more than to hear one more time.

After three rings, she finally picked up.

"Hello?" Her voice rang like a bell in Kendall's ears.

"Hey, Jo."

"Kendall?"

"Yeah" he chuckled softly. Same old Jo…

"What's up?" He realized she was yawning.

"Nothing…did I wake you?"

"It's no big deal, don't worry. I'm glad to hear from you. I miss you."

"Yeah, me too." His heart clenched in his hollowed out chest.

_What hurts the most_

_was being so close,_

_and having so much to say_

_and watching you walk away._

_And never knowing _

_what could have been,_

_and not seeing that loving you_

_is what I was trying to do…_

"Uh, yeah."  
>"Then spill it, Knight!" She laughed quietly, and Kendall closed his eyes, relishing in the sound of her laugh again.<p>

"I don't know…"

"I want to hear it. Come on, please?"

"Fine…" He took a deep breath, staring at the ceiling. Was he really about to do this?

"Kendall?"

_Yes._

"I love you."

Jo gasped.

"I know I should have told you while we were still together, but I can't hold it in any longer."

She smiled through the phone before replying,

"Kendall, don't worry…

I love you too."

Kendall smiled a true smile for the first time in what seemed like forever. She loved him too.

"I wish we could be together."

"I know, but New Zealand is a big step for my career. Maybe another day, we'll be together again. I know we'll make it."

"Still friends?"

"Always!"

Kendall laughed, and Jo followed, then yawned. "You're, uh, probably really tired. Go to sleep, Jo."

"Okay." She yawned again. "I love you."

"I love you too, beautiful."

She hung up, and Kendall followed. His smile was still on his face from his conversation.

Yeah, they would make it someday.

_And having so much to say_

_and watching you walk away._

_And never knowing _

_what could have been,_

_and not seeing that loving you_

_is what I was trying to do._

_What hurts the most_

_was being so close,_

_and having so much to say_

_and watching you walk away._

_And never knowing _

_what could have been,_

_and not seeing that loving you_

_is what I was trying to do_

_is what I was trying to do…_

**AN: Thank you for reading! I really hope you liked it! Hopefully if people like this one, I might try a few more of these depending on the song and my inspiration. Thanks again and please review! It would mean a lot! :D**


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